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Archive for October, 2008

Updating Life!

mmmm lets see what i have been up to lately…..

mmm on a second thought…lets skip this post!

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COINCIDENCE

It was the time when the high-heeled shoes started to hurt her feet, yet she did not feel like giving up shopping. Randomly, she entered another store to buy a pair of shoes—of course red—After changing her shoes and feeling such a relief on her feet, she decided to go to the bookstore to get the books she ordered last week.

While she was careful with her accelerated steps, she was checking the book list at the same time. Her extreme care with her walk did not prevent her from dashing against someone. Now her shopping bags were everywhere. She frowned and kneeled down to gather her stuff without paying attention to the person, who was now also kneeled down across to her. There was no sorry, no excuse, no help offer from his side. He just stood still even without blinking.

She stood up saying sorry herself but he was still on his knees. She heard him saying “Forgive me!” She said “No problem as long as we are not hurt, right?” She was still busy with her shopping stuff. He repeated “You should forgive me.” Then she came to recognize his voice and looked at him. The very same person who had made her fall in love with himself, letting her be deceived by him, then moving ahead into another life leaving her behind without making even a brief explanation.

He repeated for the third time, “Please forgive me, and let me explain, please.” There was the familiar anger in her eyes. Without pausing between the words, she said, “You are my past, yet you ruined my present, now let me catch up with my future.” Then she turned her back and kept walking, letting the man remain on his knees.

He did not know whether she ever forgave him or not, nor did she!

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GIVE A VOICE…

I am in love with a voice

Unknown…

And Unique…

Takes the shape of every whisper I hear

Felt in every breath I feel

Always tells me about love

How desirous it has been

Each time it embraces me

How much lust it has shown

All the way it touches me

A voice curing all my wounds

Removing all the pain i have

Cheering up my soul

and so echoing in my mind

A voice…

How much I run after

How rare I come across

Never been mine

Always with me but never been mine

Still I am in love…

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lamha lamha umar baat le –one who’ll share every moment with me
meri tanhayian kaat le-
and take away my loneliness
har ghadi bas mera naam le-
one who’ll think of only me every minute
ladkhadayon joh main thaam le-
and catch me if I falter
mere saare sapne sajaye-
who’ll adorn my dreams
meri palko mein ghar banaye-
and reside in my eyes [*]

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 The new book of Orhan Pamuk at last took its place on the shelves. “Masumiyet Müzesi” (Museum of Innocence–literally) is often categorized as a novel of romance but the writer states it is more than that. It is not only about love but also, human relations, friendship, marriage, passion and many other humanly feelings.

Here i am not going to go into detail about the book regarding its matter of subject, the style in which it is written or the readers’ feedback as i have not read the book yet. May be i should spare another page for its review after finishing the book.

By chance today i came across with the author on T.V. talking about his writing life, his career all throughout, about his new book and its process and the nobel prize he got. Listening to all these talks, seeing the author’s enthusiasm about his book, the discipline he applied on himself, the ethics, his love for writing really touched me today.

So, i got a new motive to read this book and right now i m adding it into my Target Books…Lets see when i will be able to read this book as there are still many waiting to be finished…Well as all of us know…So many books, so less time…!

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SNOWFLAKE…

First snowflake of the year. She focused her looks on the calendar to confirm the date once more – – 3rd of February – – her birthday.

She woke up earlier today although it was weekend. She opened the curtains to a white world and started to watch the snow even without blinking her eyes. Each time a snowflake reached the ground and melted in the soil, she remembered him. Each time a snowflake was gone with the wind in the air carelessly here and there, she remembered him. And each time a snowflake fell onto the window smiling at her with a soft and calm move, she remembered him.

 

It was her birthday so the time was not proper to think about him, to remember him or frankly speaking to miss him. That would put her into an expectation, expecting a call for her birthday as his velvet-like voice, his warm smile contrasting to the cold whether would be the best gift she could ever have in her entire life, yet he had forgotten her last birthday.

 

She looked at the watch, it was 8 am. She tried to calculate the time in Ontario. It must have passed the midnight. He must have been sleeping already. For a short while, she got lost in her mind surrounded by the thoughts all about him. She thought they never watched the same moon at the same time, they never blinked at the sun at the same time, they never got wet under the same rain, and they never breathed the same air or never felt the cold face of the same snow…

 

That was nothing more than nonsense. She always thought she ended this issue in her mind months ago but her heart was against her as usual. Trying to divert her attention from him to something else she took a few steps towards the kitchen. All of a sudden she realized something on the carpet. A hairclip with blue-pink butterfly on it, the pair of which was sent to him a year ago in an envelope full of love and hope. Now she did not have enough courage to take it from the ground or to handle the situation itself. Right now this tiny hairclip let her dig her past deeper and deeper. She remembered how they used to imagine a day to spend together. A day in Ontario, on a lonely street buried into silence with the snow covering the whole city.

They would be walking hand in hand slowly, silently feeling each other more on each step. They would let the snow hide their footprints they left on the snowy road.

He would be smoking at the same time. She never had any special reason but she always had the impression that he looked more charming while smoking. After a long walk they would be sitting on a cold bench not even minding its being wet by snow. They would be looking each other’s eyes searching for the traces of love more and more until feeling satisfied. Her nose would be reddish due to chilling wind and he would warm it by rubbing his nose onto hers. That would let her feel his breath on her face…

 

These daydreams were going on for hours each time they called each other and just before they end the call, they used to repeat their promise given by heart: “No matter what happens, no matter where we are, no matter how old we are, no matter with whomever we are, we will meet at least once before we die!”.

She heard his voice echoing in her ear as if it was just whispered. She realized the bitter truth of the world once again. Different nations, different cultures, different religions, and parents isolating their children from this “difference”.

 

The voice in her ear carried on: “I know we have no end but I promise you I will be yours and only yours forever. Can you promise me as well?”

She whispered to herself “I promise”.

As soon as she finished her sentence the phone rang. Before daring to hear who it was, she checked the time again. It was 8:45 am. She picked it up. That familiar soft voice:

“Happy Birthday Ducky!”

 

Although she was longing for this call, hence waiting for it, she was shocked and had no words to speak. For a while they stayed silent. Then the guy carried on:

“Don’t you want to know about your birthday gift?”

“Even this meant a lot. Thank you for your nice behavior.”

“No, no…ask about your gift!”

“Ok then, what is my birthday gift?”

“A flight ticket!”

“Ticket? For me?”

“No, actually for myself.”

“For yourself? Ok, but to where?”

“To you!”

 

Just then another snowflake fell on the window slipping downwards smiling at her…

 

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“The voice of life in me cannot reach the ear of life in you; but let us talk that we may not feel lonely.”

By Khalil Gibran

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